Hello Beloved Kin.
I have been through space and time, to hell and back again, burnt alive and burnt away, in and out of consciousness and now I sit here whole, renewed and rejuvenated, more than ever before. The time of purification was, yet again, upon me. I had to call it in, and go through the fire. In and out of this madness, in and out of consciousness, I had visions, all clean, all simple and all comforting. In one instance, a Fairy Elder, was with me, a bearded, thick haired man, who was playing with materials, shaping, molding, creating, and affixing spires to his creation. In another vision, he was placing what turned out to be a crown, very ceremoniously upon my head. I could not see myself, but the man was such a beloved member of our Kin, and I was touched at his gentleness and the way he felt, as he placed this upon my head. I was pleased. He was proud.
Also, since last week, or last eon, I was given a gift by my Fairy Ally Catherine, and not just a gift, but also friendship and repeated assistance throughout this past eon/week.
And finally, I will tell the story, the one I was gifted with before this past eon had come and gone, a story I didn't want to tell because I didn't want it. Why I could not understand why it would not go away, and why it persisted and refused my own creational process. I learned, through my ally, that it was because it was not meant to be dismissed as I was trying to do, it was meant to be embraced. If not for Catherine I would not understand the meaning of it all, which I will tell now.
After writing "My Beloved Speaks'', I intended to write something everyday, of our lives, as both a creational act and as an alchemical infusion of the worlds I hold in my deepest heart, bringing forthe into our realms here the magic from the sublayers of our existence there.
I had come up with one, or rather I should say one came up within me as I watched it unfolding in my visionary eye. I will tell it now, and then explain, why I was dismissing it and why I so embrace it now........
~ I awoke in the dark night, my eyes opening quickly, alert and wide. I quickly mentally scanned for my beloved and realized I could not ''reach'' him. This meant he was not only not asleep, but had closed himself off for privacy. For no one may be telepathically available if they choose not to be. And usually when one of us closes down for privacy it means we are engaged and do not wish to be disturbed for one reason or another. However, when beloveds close down with each other, it is very rare since our greatest joy is to be forever united, and when we shut the other out, it means something of great importance which must be understood. I at this point however, did not understand.
I mentally called out to him but received no response and I could not sense him. I went to his rooms, and he was not there. I decided to find him and understand what has him closed down to me. I went back to my rooms and grabbed my cloak and put my boots on for protection. I ran down the stairs with my cloak flying behind me as I kept my mind open to receive any indication where he might be at this midnight hour. A few candles were still lit and burning low so I could see around the house and he was not in it. I go to the back archway which is the entrance to the main courtyard where all other areas are available from, and as I approach it I can see a few torchlights still lit for nighttime visibility. I see a woman in the distance and another man conversing with the moon......each having their own communion with the Natural Kingdoms in their own ways. I scan my mind again for my beloveds location, and I see he is deep in the woods. I decide to go in to meet him. As I'm wandering in deeper and deeper the wolfe friend comes running from the depths to meet with me, he has sensed my presence and came to escort me at this time of night. He is truly a wise friend. I ask him telepathically if he has seen my beloved and he says yes. He directs me to the right, and tells me he is there and safe too. I am curious, as I begin to walk in that direction. My beloved will sense me now as I approach his vicinity, and if he needs his privacy he will tell me before I reach him, if not, approaching him is welcome. He has sensed me and has communicated that he is on the way to meet me. I can feel a smile in his heart and I am soothed. Wolfe runs ahead to greet him so I know he is close. Soon he is before me and we are looking into each others eyes. He has something in his hand. He tells me he wanted to surprise me with this gift but knew it was only a matter of time before I discovered he was away at times working on something. However, he is happy I didn't discover this until now, as he is finished tonight with this gift, this surprise. He holds it up, shows me a most elegant, exquisitely crafted sword of the most beautiful kind. It is a work of immeasurable skill, magic, and Beauty. Forged with the Magic of Elementals, The Tuatha De Danann, but mostly feelings of love.....his love, and it is uniquely mine. I can see it and feel it. He is very proud of his craftsmanship and I am in awe of its absolute perfection.
I am also deeply disappointed.
I wanted nothing to do with swords, a weapon, a sharp object used for killing, or an object of so much metal, having nothing alive nor soft in it. I do not know why he made me a thing of such beauty, and destruction.
My beloved can feel my feelings exactly being an empath, and he knows and feels my disappointment. Somehow, he is not swayed by my response. He has an understanding I do not have yet.
We stand in the midnight of dark, in the woods, with our friend Wolfe watching us from a distance who listens intently as he understands this is a moment of profound implications, one that would shape the future of our lives, the future of our people. He listens, as I ask my beloved the meaning of this gift.
My beloved says, he has been escaping for months now, in private, at all hours of day and night, crafting this sword for me with all the skill of The Tuatha De Danann of the Ages. He says when all needs of the day were taken care of, when I myself had no needs except for my own solitude, in these quiet times he would go and do this work. He would take any time, day or night, and he would, in peace, work on this magical artifact.
He says there is only a certain way such a device may be crafted and he has incorporated every single one. With the magic of his lineage, he had begun the work with absolute integrity and with absolute love, for only one of such a love as his is allowed to forge such a device as this sword, and only for a beloved. What goes into such a device is not only alchemical but is imbued with the most powerful force in the universe, Love. And it is this love with which he crafted this sacred artifact for me. He has worked through hours and days of prayer, of focusing on his Love, of utterance of invocations, intentions, and magical words of protection. I can see beautiful inscriptions inlaid on the blade. He has not swayed for a second from his task of concentrated focus every second of forging this device for me. This alone, to retain this degree of focus hour after hour is a skill rare among any but the most disciplined which is why only certain Beings qualify to create such a device, only one who has given his heart in love and spirit for the highest good can create such an artifact. He tells me he began this work with an indication that the magical realms called to me, to enter more deeply, more fully, to be the full embodiment of my Soul's Essence.
My beloved is such a wise and caring man.
Upon his words of heartfelt explaining and narration, I became undone. I wanted this gift more than anything, but I still didn't want a ''sword''.....a ''weapon'', a sharp object known to hurt or kill. I understood what went into its making, but still didn't understand its use, what he had created, forged out of love and masterful skills and prayer.
~end.
And my creational story would not go away, nor could I change any of it. It remained, and so I, left it.
I could not get this story out of my head, and as each successive day and night passed, I wanted to create another one as I felt my creational abilities had gone awry that I could ''imagine'' a story about something I did not even want, and yet it would not go away, and I could not create a single other thing in my imagination. I still did not realize yet, that this was not imagination, but events unfolding in the ''other realms'', real and timely.
So after going through the fire, and in my successive talks with my new ally Catherine, it happened in our discussions the ''sword'' came up, and when she mentioned it, I told her about my inability to write more about my days with my beloved because this story of the sword wouldn't go away, nor allow any other to take its place.
Then she asked me what color it was and I told her, and she put her face in her hands and began to explain to me yet again, the meaning and implications of something about which I had no clue.
The ''sword'' of my story was no sword in the traditional sense nor meaning.....at all !
It was a completely different object than what people have come to understand, myself included.
It is in truth and in origin, a magical artifact forged out of love, by love for love, and created and intended for use only in cermonial ritual and for other uses of power, and for nothing else. Its uses as a magical device of power and enhancement of its owner have no comparison in the muggle or mortal worlds, as magical devices have been surgically removed from the Human experience by the dark priests. So nothing of equal to a Magical Artifact can be given as analogy in your/our world.
What the world of common mortal men have made of the sword is another matter entirely as they weaponize anything and everything they can.....and so what was originally a Magical Artifact was defiled into a thing of destruction, and it became something I did not want in my life.
I had not been educated on what the origins were, nor the true meaning of this ''sword'' which I shall henceforthe call a Magical Artifact, and in my ignorance had tried to dismiss it, and did not see its significance and importance in my beloved's crafting and forging of this deep magical device for me.....until now.
It was the greatest honor of Giving, aside from giving one your own heart, but I didn't see that then. I do now.
Some of what Catherine explained to me follows:
" First, .....This sword had the gift (illumination) of speech. The Leabhor na h'Uidre mentiones the sword which would turn against the holder if false speech was uttered. Then there is the tale of the "Sword of Light," which, in the hands of the Draoi, possessed the ability to remove spells and provide protection. "
"We find the Bright Sword of the Tuatha de Danann a tool and not a weapon. In addition, that tool is consistently linked to the magical element. In summation, the Bright Sword was a symbol rooted deeply in the history and consciousness of the Tuatha de Danann, long before their arrival on the Emerald Isle in the 13th century BC. It held the magical qualities of not only protection, but also was a symbol of illumination, wisdom, skill, creativity, speech and honor."
And so I discover through Catherine what my beloved had forged for me was nothing less than the Magical Artifact of Illumination, Wisdom, Skill, Creativity, Speech and Honor......specifically known as The Bright Sword of The Tuatha De Danann peoples, my people, my beloved.
And I am now responsible of my own volition to master all the uses of this sacred artifact in my own time. A ''sword', an artifact that is powerful in both realms, here and there, both of which I dwell in.
I had not been able to dismiss, or forget the ''story'' which had shown up in my minds eye because it was no story....it was an experience, and experience cannot and will not be dismissed or replaced especially when it is revealing something of such great importance. Therefore, it would neither go away nor allow it to be replaced. My 'imagination' went into lockdown. Also, my lack of understanding of the meaning of this artifact should have shown me I had to do some investigating as to the true meaning of a ''thing'' that ''shows up'' but for which I have discord. Lastly, that I was blessed with Catherine's understanding of what it means, and her supplying me with the information of what it means specifically to my beloved's people, my people, The Tuatha De Danann, to forge such an artifact, and to bestow it upon a loved one, blew my mind, since it explained precisely what I needed when I needed it.
My beloved has honored me so greatly, and I am humbled by his gift. I accept it with all my heart, throughout all time.